Dear Haters

Dear Haters,

I have HATED MYSELF ALL BECAUSE OF YOU! For years and years I literally thought I was the UGLIEST creature to ever walk this planet because of things YOU said to me.

I cut myself, my wrists, my legs, my stomach, anywhere I could cover up easily so my mother wouldn't ask about it. I would turn up the sound on my television so no one would hear me cry myself to sleep. I BEGGED my mother to let me stay home from school so I didn't look at your faces and listen to your cruelty behind my back cause you were to much of a PANSY to say it to my face!

I used to look in the mirror and ask myself what was wrong with me, why do people hate me, am I to different, am I really that ugly, do I really look like a beached whale... I couldn't figure out what possessed these people to pick on me for my brain, my weight, my smarts, my imagination, anything that was different.

I remember there was a time where I didn't pick up a book or a pencil and paper in school because I couldn't deal with all the back lash from all of you people making me feel like I was stupid and disgusting! From the start of school I have listened to your snickers and comments about me and I'm sick of it, I'm two years out of high school and I STILL deal with you and your bile filled hate speech.

• You're fat
• You're to different
• You need to go die
• I hate you because of your size and the way you speak about things like you know more than I do
• You're so stupid why even bother

And so many more...

Despite all this, all the nights I have cried, the pain I have inflicted on myself because of you, the mind games I still play with myself because of the things you have told me all these years....I forgive you.

I forgive you for making me feel like I would never be good enough for anyone because of who I am, for making me feel like I am so ugly no one could ever love me, that if I did find someone who loved me they would leave me because I was to different, that I was worthless because I was born.

I forgive every single person who called me names, treated me bad and caused me to think I am ugly, never believing people who say good things about me because only people who pity me would do that. I do not hate you for not wanting to understand me or be friends with me.

There is something I will not stand for though...acting like these things never happened and trying to be all unicorns and rainbows towards me now. I will not stand for people like you, that is why you are NOT in my life and NEVER will be.

I have become a better person because of you, I have grown and surpassed anything you ever thought I could be and do because of the hate you poured into my veins through my ears. I have begun to see myself differently, to love the body I am in and treat it with the respect it deserves as I become the best version of myself with so much help from you that you don't even realize because in your mind "it never happened".

I am who I am today because of you and I forgive you and release that part of my life to rid my energy of all the hate so I can move up and beyond you and your low vibrations.

Thank you, really.